A seasonal note arrives from the Editor. Enough of the foie gras and caviar, boys, it rants, what the readers want to know about at this time of year is healthy stuff.

Hmmm. Perhaps, we thought, the cafe at this urban spa might fit the bill. The website promises ‘healthy food that makes you feel
good’ and an ethos ‘connecting beauty, environment and well-being’.

So it was we found ourselves in what is fundamentally the anteroom to a hairdressing salon. Not just any old hairdressing salon, you understand. The salon – among the largest we have ever seen – is but one part of a panoply of spa offerings. Before you actually get in to all that, though, you hit the café.

The punters all looked depressingly normal. Not radiant and sun-kissed (nor sandal-wearing and bearded). In fact, as is so often the case, the staff are rather better-looking than the punters. Perhaps they’re the ones who take this healthy living lark really seriously.

The setting, if rather odd, is airy and comfortable. It’s a light space, suited to reading the eco-friendly publications thoughtfully provided, but this does not in fact seem to be a haven of West End eco-contemplation – more a handy and elegant spot to meet up for a light lunch.

The food nods in all the directions you might expect, but doesn’t offer anything very radical. A chicken miso soup was pleasant enough, but no more. A ‘veggie club’ sandwich sounded something of a contradiction in terms, and such was our experience – in fact, it had no discernible flavour whatsoever. Dessert comprised quite good coffee and a nice but unremarkable cake. All-in-all, everything was fine, but nothing to write home, nor especially energising.

A whole week of this? Surely we can talk?